Thursday, July 30, 2009

Bad Blogger

My plan was to blog a ton while I was in Europe this summer. I figured my life would have this exciting aura surrounding it as I traveled from country to country experiencing new things and living day to day uncertain of what was to greet me around the next bend. If anything, it was sure to be a lot more interesting than my groundhogs day existence living at the Training Center. And I wanted to share it all because…well, that’s what narcissistic people do. We blog, twitter, and facebook because we are absolutely certain that thousands of people all around the world are holding their breath in anticipation waiting to find out what’s going on in our lives. Which is why I feel like a disappointment. Here it is, almost the end of the week and I’ve been silent. I feel like I should blog, and then it hits me that I have nothing worthwhile to share. But that’s not totally true; I have found that lately I share whatever I find to be amusing or newsworthy in 140 characters or less, Twitter style. And once I’ve done that, I’m left with not much more to share here. So until I figure out a solution to this terribly frustrating conundrum, I am going to blog a few of my favorite tweets from the past week. Some may see it as a self-absorbed laziness…and they just may be correct.

Tweet: I eat gelato pretty much every night...but I'm walking more than usual with all this public transportation so I pray it evens out.

Americans are known to be the most overweight country in the World, and it’s sometimes hard to fathom when you go to countries and can’t walk five steps without seeing another gelato shop, pastry heaven, or beer garden. So I’ve deduced that it’s because they walk so much more. I don’t have a car here so I must walk everywhere, even if it’s to the train station a half mile away. And those extra calories I burn are sure to be replenished with all the gelato I consume. On a normal day it’s just a mere scoop, and then on occasion it can get out of hand…. But did I mention how much I’m walking?! Here is one particular day where we indulged at dinnertime.



("Life is uncertain. Eat dessert first.")

Tweet: Riddle me this...why is a beer cheaper than the smallest imaginable glass of water in Germany? Guess it shows where their priorities are!

Nobody in Germany is properly hydrated. I know this for a fact. How could you be when it costs twice as much to buy a shot of water (or juice, cola, etc) than it does to buy a beer? The other night I ordered a fanta with my meal and I tried my very hardest to make it last by taking the tiniest imaginable sips and swirling my one piece of ice around until it slowly disappeared. But even with all that effort I was finished with it before my meal came. So I asked for some water, hoping they would just give me regular tap water and let me be. She served me a small wine glass filled with water and when I gulped that down she asked if I wanted more. It came straight in a glass and not a bottle so I figured at least it was free. Wrong. My Barbie sized fanta and two shot glasses of water cost more than my meal!

Tweet: I just got felt up at the security checkpoint. Like...for real, for real.

Granted, I did set off the beeper, even though I’m not sure how. But when I went to get frisked, it was as if I was on my way to serve a 6 month prison term. (At least this is what I believe they do to you when you go to the slammer.) I realize in America we are just a bit more prudish, but if I didn’t have as much melanin in my skin, you would have definitely seen my cheeks a bit flushed. My bra was fully cupped. (Notice I say bra, and not breast…this is one advantage to wearing a padded bra, the violation will be less severe.) Honestly, the whole thing was just a bit comical. I have no doubt they were just doing their job, but lets just say they take their job very seriously.

Sorry for the overlap, I promise to try and do better in the future!


Diandra Ann said...

I liked this! It was fun to see what was behind your tweets! I hear more and more that people arent blogging as much because of twitter. I think this is a cool idea though :)

anonymousnupe said...

Wait, can you go back over the part about you being frisked, again please. But more slowly this time. And don't leave out any details. Purely for the education and benefit of those of us who might find ourselves in similar circumstances in our future travels, mind you. LOL!

Wayne said...

Are you planning to put all of your blogs, tweets, etc. in book form in the future?! Would make a great read! God Bless in Berlin!

Anonymous said...

Finally a blog update! I thought you had quit.
OK, four servings of gelato consumed by three people in one sitting means everybody ate too much.
Then, tap water is suspicious everywhere where they use euros, so go to REI and get a small Brita type filter to fit in your purse. It will later make a good conversation starter. Q: "What is that?" A:"it's for pleasuring my water"
Also, about the patdown, yes, euros have a whole lot more cajones when it comes to "all up in the grill" type proximity.
Lastly, make promise keep a promise

Anonymous said...

I agree with Wayne's comment above. I think the difference between you and a number of bloggers is that you are a good writer, which is the same difference between people who merely have access to a web log application and professional journalists. Thanks for sharing your journey.

PoliSports said...

Are you allowed to eat this?