fed up

I have been on zero worthwhile dates lately. And by zero I mean negative seven. Seriously, it is that bad. And as you may have noticed, I really don’t talk too much about my dating life on this here blog so for me to mention anything says a lot. For starters, it says that I don’t too much care what anyone may think who just might happen to stumble across it. Because of the fact that I am not an anonymous blogger and I realize that many people I know may read my blog, I try and limit the amount of personal information involving the opposite sex both for their sake and mine. It happens all too often when I just assume people aren’t reading and then one day a simple reference slips into the conversation. And with dating, or almost dating, or hopefully dating soon, you don’t ever want to show all your cards and let the other person know just exactly what you are thinking and you also don’t always need to put other people’s business on front street just because you choose to put your own out there. But right now I am at my limit because there is just no reason that one person should be made to put up with such ridiculousness. And perhaps I will stop short of naming names or divulging any significant details to fully call out the perpetrators, but I thought I would at least let you in on where my mood is at right now. Now mind you, this is a build up of emotions that have merely been heightened since I’ve been back in California. I figured that being back here would at least widen my options and put me back in the swing of things but I might as well be living in Alaska for all the good it’s done me.

I have learned, in my old age, that there really is no reason to put up with behavior that shows any hints of a lack of respect. I need people to respect my time, I need for them to not play games, I need for their actions to follow their words, and I need for them to grow up. I have learned, thankfully, that there is no need to make excuses for actions that are not in line with the characteristics I am looking for in the man of my dreams. And while I realize that every man I date will more than likely not be the man of my dreams, I know better than to spend time with those I am already positive are not. You teach people how to treat you. And I might not know much, but I understand more and more how I deserve to be treated. It is no secret that I think highly of myself and have high expectations, but I assure you I’m no crazy lady. It amazes me what people think they can get away with and what they think will be excused.

So yes, I’ve been single for quite some time. And from the looks of it, it seems like my situation will not be changing any time soon. Understand that this is not something that causes me too much uneasiness. There are plenty of times I like my single status and I don’t go out of my way to change it. If a good guy comes along…then great. But if not, I simply continue to love life and be grateful that I have such wonderful friends and exciting hobbies. I’m not lonely or desperate and it doesn’t make me anxious when people continually ask why I’m single. I’m single simply because I’m not in a relationship. I’m not in a relationship because I don’t settle. I don’t settle because I don’t have to. When people give me less than their best I simply say “thanks, but no thanks”. I just know I’m worth more than that half-hearted attempt at decency. I am far better off not wasting my time with people who don’t deserve it and right now NOBODY is showing me that they deserve it. Yes, that means YOU(just in case you might be reading this).


END RANT.