When it comes right down to it, I really am a humble gal about most things. I don't walk around thinking I'm the best thing since sliced bread and telling everyone in earshot how fabulous I am unless I'm at home and my little sister needs reminding. When it comes to anything concerning physical appearance, it's far to subjective to consider yourself superior in pretty much any category, and if you live in Southern California, the absolute capitol of Superficialdom, you can easily look around at any point and time and find someone who has a better this, a bigger or smaller that, and a far better defined anything, EXCEPT, in my case, ABDOMINAL SECTION.
I have a pretty amazing midsection if you tend to be partial towards stomachs that are defined and ripped. And I realize that there are plenty of people that aren't, and that's totally okay. It doesn't really negate the fact that that is what mine looks like. It's pretty much fact rather than opinion. You might think that sounds incredibly arrogant, but I assure you it's not. Once I'm done competing I plan on flattening it out just a bit if possible and laying off the Ninja Turtle look, so it's not my optimal stomach, and besides, the fact that I carry such little body fat is directly proportional to the sad truth that I don't have fat lumps on other parts of my body where I reaaaaallly wish I did. So, I promise you there is no reason whatsoever to be jealous.
All that to say that last week I put out on social media that I was going in for a casting for some ab infomercial where they needed background people with "ripped, defined abs." I was already pre-selected to be seen through my agency, because I just don't believe in going to open, random castings when what they are looking for is so subjective. But in this case, I figured not only do they need 8 people, there just isn't really something I am more qualified for. I am pretty much a shoo in. Of course I should have remembered that one time I didn't get that commercial when they were looking for a long jumper, with curly hair, approximately 5'6, with brown skin and a dimple in her right cheek.
So, I went to the audition. i let them take pictures of me in a sports bra and shorts and then film me using their gadgety little ab machine that didn't make my abs sore AT ALL, but caused me to really take notice of my hip flexors and inner thighs. (Note to consumers: if you really want a ripped midsection, don't bother with gadgets and machines). They said they would be in contact by the end of the week to let me know if I got the job and give me all the pertinent information. That was last week and I never received a phone call.
I'm pretty sure I didn't get the job. Did they want all blondes? Was there a height requirement? Would I have made the main talent look subpar? One will never know. But I just have a hard time believing that 8 people walked into that casting with more "ripped, and defined" abs than me. But then again, this is Southern California, and maybe I haven't been looking around hard enough.